Senior Moments: Should I Be Worried?

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Although I don’t particularly like the term “senior moment,” most older people know what that means. When someone who is at middle age or beyond has difficulty remembering something such as, “Where did I put my reading glasses?” or “I can’t remember her name” he/she may find someone else responding in a joking fashion, “Are you having a ‘senior moment?'” The other person is replying with a joke about having a poor memory. I have heard people themselves make jokes about their own “senior moments” in hopes of making light of the situation. It’s true that as people age there are normally changes in memory and thinking skills. On one end of the spectrum there is normal aging that affects everyone. At the other end is dementia which is common but not normal.  In between is a condition known as mild cognitive impairment. I will touch on all three.

We all have memory lapses on occasion

It’s true we all have occasional lapses in our memory. I even see my teenage children doing it. I even remember walking into a room years ago, forgetting what I went in there for, having to go back to what I was doing in order to jog my memory. Little lapses in memory is common for everyone. We get distracted or side-tracked especially when it is something that is not really that significant. Forgetting names is a common occurrence for example.

I have been working with older adults for over 25 years now and I see all different types of memory and thinking problems. I also know many older people (including caregivers) who do not show any signs of cognitive (brain function) decline.

I often note increased anxiety in people who are struggling with the loss of cognitive abilities. It must be a scary feeling to know that they are losing their faculties.

One of the common fears people have is developing dementia. Declining memory skills are often one of the first signs of dementia. The good news is that memory problems do not always lead to dementia.

Normal aging, mild cognitive impairment and dementia

Slowed thinking and minor problems with remembering things is quite common and almost expected in our later years. There are some things we can do to help reduce our risks of further problems with our cognition such as exercising (to get the blood pumping to our organs including the brain) and doing brain exercises (such as crosswords and learning a new musical instrument). Normal aging causes us to slow down in more ways than one.

Sometimes our memory problems become more problematic and they are noticed by other people. If you are continuously forgetting someone’s name or miss appointments, this may start to interfere with your relationships and daily functioning. You may have to learn new ways of coping with the normal changes in your brain such as keeping lists handy and using your calendar more regularly. Memory and thinking problems that can be noticed by others but don’t really affect your day-to-day functioning is called Mild Cognitive Impairment (MCI).

By the way, it’s a good sign if a person is aware of or concerned about their changing memory skills as one of the skills lost in dementia is the ability to know they have problems with their memory. If you ask someone with dementia if he/she has memory problems, he/she will most likely say “No.” It’s true that long term memory may still be intact.  It’s the ability to remember recent events and learn new information that is lost.

In some cases your memory skills, thinking and cognitive functioning may be impaired to the point where you can no longer do things on your own. For example, you may need someone to give you your medication on a daily basis or else you will forget. Or you can no longer drive because your sense of direction is off. Dementia is a syndrome and can be found in a variety of conditions  that affect cognition (such as Alzheimer’s disease). In early stages of dementia you can  live on your own as long as you can enlist the support you need to keep yourself safe. Dementia can create a variety of problems. For example, sometimes people with dementia forget to eat, or think they have already eaten. In this case it’s important to have someone provide a reminder or stop by to ensure he/she eats. In the later stages of dementia, it is not possible to live alone.

Seek a memory assessment if you are concerned

If you are concerned about your memory skills or other brain-related functions (such as language, problem-solving or judgment skills), please speak to your doctor for a memory assessment. Let your doctor know if you are concerned your problems are beyond the changes seen in normal aging (such as slowed thinking, and the occasional difficulty remembering things). Only a skilled practitioner can diagnose and determine the difference between normal aging, mild cognitive impairment and dementia, and provide treatment and management solutions.

For more information, check out National Institute on Aging’s  Memory, Forgetfulness, and Aging: What’s Nomal and What’s Not.

You may also like to check out Senior Moments Explained by Terry Hollenbeck, M.D.

Angela G. Gentile, MSW RSW

www.AngelaGGentile.com

An Empowering Read for Women, Business Owners and Marketers

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GeroFuturist Karen Sands’ book, “Gray is the New Green: Rock Your Revenues in the Longevity Economy” (2016) is THE book you need to read if you are a middle-aged career women, business owner or marketer and are looking for lucrative opportunities. This small but mighty book covers topics such as ageism in society, business trends, marketing, careers and entrepreneurial opportunities in the field of aging, unretirement, reinvention, and visionaries. Sands intersperses loads of great data and statistics and references other thought leaders throughout the book, providing convincing evidence and support to her thoughts and ideas on “gray is the new green.” She encourages a narrative “re-storying” approach to positively changing the way we think about aging, careers and business.

She uses some familiar and unfamiliar terms such as:

– Longevity Economy
– Ageless Women
– Ageless Technology
– Conscious Aging
– Positive Aging
– Educational Gerontologist
– Age-Friendly Workplace
– Boomerpreneurs
– Solopreneurs
– Grannypreneurs

Hopefully these terms will be defined in Sands’ online glossary (not available at time of printing).

The book is sectioned into three chapters. The last chapter repeats most of what was in the first two. There were many topics that stood out for me as a 50-year-old woman. Sands talks about “The Change” (menopause) and embracing our “Inner Crone.” She empowers the reader when she tells us we can “radically reframe the stories we tell ourselves about aging.” It jolted me a bit when she proclaims 50 is universally “Over the Hill” according to Human Resource (HR) directors.

Sands challenges marketers to get beyond the rampant “malevolent ageism” in corporate marketing. She gives a few examples of how advertisers are inadvertently turning off women aged 50 and up who are the “highest increasing-spenders” in the fashion and beauty industries by creating offensive ads that portray older women in a negative way.

For businesses to succeed in this “Gray Tsunami” era, Sands recommends that diversity, gender equality and work-life balance initiatives must be welcomed and incorporated. She warns businesses that don’t adopt and welcome these changes will be left behind.

For those interested in working with or for the aging population, she states the “field of aging is evolving at warp speed.” She gives a listing of up-and-coming careers and opportunities in the aging field such as “cutting-edge age-friendly technology and devices, home design…and adult education.”

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Karen Sands, GeroFuturist

Sands sheds some light on the notion of retirement and how our extended middle-age is changing the way we view working in our later years. She says, “Aging does not mean retiring.” She discusses how people are reinventing themselves, or they are “unretiring.” Others are choosing not to retire. She predicts employees and leaders alike will be working until they die.

For those Boomer Women who want to reinvent themselves by starting up a new business, she provides lots of great advice and questions to think about in Chapter 2. She offers a great tip for a business idea, which is to offer a product or service that can help people save time. She tells women to “awaken their visionary voice” and states “it is never too late to be a visionary.” In Chapter 3 she states although some women may not be ready for this change yet, she encourages them to do the “prep work” now so that they can “leap with confidence” when they are ready.

Although there is not much new in Chapter 3, I love the advice she gives regarding aging. Sands writes, “Marketing, and society as a whole, need to understand that we no longer wish to be told that aging is something we need to be against. Agelessness is about embracing and enhancing who we are, not blindly following an outdated standard of who we should be.”

“Gray is the New Green” is an empowering book for women. It is a goldmine for those in business. It is a lifesaver for marketers and organizations.

The book is available at Amazon.com in paperback and Kindle versions.

Note: I was given a copy of this book in exchange for an honest review.

Angela G. Gentile, MSW, RSW
http://www.AngelaGGentile.com

Aging with Grace is All About Acceptance and Attitude

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Aging with Grace Defined Survey Results

 

What does “Aging with grace” mean to you?

To help me get a sense of what this term really means, I surveyed 24 people of all ages (most aged 50-69) and asked them to define “Aging with grace.” I enjoyed reading through the responses and I’d like to thank everyone who participated. I’d like to share with you what I learned, and I will also include my own thoughts on the subject.

“Grace is a quality that many aspire to, but I think in the context of today’s society, what defines grace is somewhat elusive.” – Survey respondent, 49 or under

For the most part, aging with grace is one’s ability to accept growing older and all the changes that come with it. We could almost change the term to, “Aging with Acceptance.” Aging (or the passing of the years) brings many changes to our appearance and abilities (physically, mentally); it also brings changes to the world and our lives. Aging with grace means we are able to accept, adapt and accommodate these changes.

The attitude we carry into our later years will also influence our ability to age with grace.

People who are aging gracefully…

  • accept aging
  • are happy
  • are confident
  • are wise
  • live a healthy and active lifestyle

Regarding “healthy” lifestyle — as we age, our risk for developing age-related illnesses and diseases increases. I think it is important that even if we develop health conditions, we take care of ourselves and try to recover quickly or learn how to live well with chronic illness. I know many people who are aging with grace despite chronic illnesses. It all comes down to attitude.  For example, does arthritis become who you are or is it just something you need to live with and manage?

“Grace is an inside job with outside effects.” – Survey respondent, 49 or under

If we are able to practice self-love as we age, by “nurturing our bodies and minds,” (Survey respondent, 50-69) we tend to be happier and more at peace. It helps us improve our confidence, and live a life that is in line with our true and authentic selves. As we become more compassionate about ourselves we will become more compassionate about others. We can continue to be “gracious to others, and make people feel good”, no matter what their age (Survey respondent, 50-69).

“Aging with grace means aging with confidence, valuing the experience, knowledge and wisdom that comes with age, and rising above a youth-oriented culture.  – Survey respondent, 50-69

Harnessing the wisdom and personal power that comes with age helps us age with confidence. There is great significance in the realization of the value of knowledge and experience gained from years lived. Only then are we able to choose to live a life designed and driven by our own personal values. We realize that we are responsible for our own lives and decisions are made with the wisdom that comes with age and the personal power that we embrace and celebrate.

“Allowing the power and wisdom of aging to be apparent in one’s presence –      including the ability to break stereotypes of aging.” – Survey respondent, 50-69

Being present in the moment in the here-and-now, while focusing on the good things in our life will help us live and age with gratitude. Practicing mindfulness will help us age with grace.

The ability to re-frame our challenges and limitations can help improve our outlook and overall attitude. Being resilient in the face of adversity will also help us a great deal.

Living a conscious life, knowing that we have a finite time here on earth, enables us to focus on living a life that honours our individual values and goals.

I can also tell you what aging with grace IS NOT. It is not about complaining – such as “moaning upon standing” or “whining about wearing reading glasses.” Aging with grace is “void of anger, regrets and baggage from the past.”

The more we learn to accept aging as a normal lifelong process, make peace with it (not war), the happier and more confident we will be.

I’ll leave you with this: Only one person over 70 answered the survey, and gave me something to laugh about. When asked, “How would you define aging with grace?” the answer was:

“I don’t know anyone named Grace, but, I am aging.”

The survey will remain open for a few more weeks, so if you’d like to give me your definition of Aging with Grace, please go to this survey and answer three quick questions. Thanks!

Have your say – please comment below. I’d love to hear from you.

Angela G. Gentile

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Angela G. Gentile, MSW, RSW is a clinical social worker who specializes in aging. She has helped hundreds of people who are struggling with the challenges aging can bring. Angela is passionate about challenging ageist myths and stereotypes and exploring what it means to age well. She considers herself a realistic optimist but she still can’t tell her left from her right. Find out more at http://www.angelaggentile.com.